On this day...

58 years ago, my Nana and Grandad got married.

Oh, how they've loved each other. Oh, how they've loved us.

And oh, how I've loved them.

"I didn't do nuffin'!"

I've been thinking about the different jobs I've held. Some were short and therefore not so sweet; some were like chocolate. But swirled within each of 'em was some ingredient I could slag off. Here are a few of the most slaggable offerings (in no particular order):

1. Being 'called,' via intercom, loudspeaker and ol' school style through hallways, to trudge all the way up to El Jefe to retrieve a coke from the fridge in said Jefe's office within arm's reach of El diab... I mean, el jefe.

2. Riding around every day in a limousine (torture beginning at 6:30am) with a blind in one eye boss-man. And having to sit. right. by. him. (pat, pat) and take notes.

3. Being yelled and screamed at in a PMS-24-hours-a-day fueled rage for being stupidly full of initiative.

4. A futile attempt at strong arming me, by the new fat and lazy female director, to chase a female porn star down "La Croisette" to 'drum up interest' and in turn, leave my pride at the Carlton. Futile. God loves a trier.

5. Very first job. Office affair. Not mine. "Easy Single" sandwiches in the toilet cubicle. First job. 'nuff said.

6. Perfecting a blank expression witnessing boss burping, farting and sliding off leather chair while using dictation machine. Boss also perfected blank expression.

7. Having begun a job two weeks earlier, I get reamed a new one for something he told me to do a month previous. Now, I'm the first to admit my mathematical failings, but those numbers just don't add up. Oh, have I mentioned he was schizo? No? Right.

more to come...

Help the hungry and have fun too!

I stumbled across this website and it's great! It claims to provide free rice (through its advertising hits) to those who need it and it's a word game too. Be careful, it can get addictive :) and it might even make you smarter ;)

Hopefully, it does what it says. Hopefully. I did a bit of research and apparently it's been mentioned on the BBC and NPR and at this point, seems legit. Either way, if you've got some time to kill, it'll definitely help with the ol' vocab.

http://www.freerice.com

Keep both feet in the one sock, ladies!

Fearing I hadn't laughed enough today, my dear friend Katy sent me this; it's from an actual 1955 Good Housekeeping article. Click below (but do so with ladylike intention) to view it in all its informative and graceful glory... just be careful not to pull a muscle, that's indelicate.

"Not written by..."

Funny, very tongue-in-cheek, blog by a couple of striking writers (David Letterman show, David Spade Show, etc.) blogging about what they're not writing while the guild is striking.

They asked what (really bad stuff, heh) everyone else is not writing during the time, so I sent one in and they posted it. Check it out here if you want:

http://millerandgreen2.blogspot.com/

Their original post is here, some funny stuff:

http://millerandgreen.blogspot.com/

A Great Cause

http://www.womenforwomen.org/

Not the LAPD

Gardai enjoying themselves on duty in Tullamore.

I'm friggin' screwed

Einstein's brain:


Speaking of relativity, the only thing me and Al have remotely in common - the hair:


For more interesting wiki-skewed tidbits on Da Man:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Albert_Einstein's_brain

If a tree falls in a forest...

Anyone out there?

Blogging sucks! Down with blogs! So sayeth me!

And the Saints coming marching in...

Yes, just as there was that hint of Halloween in the air, that hot lady Santa Ana threatens crisp nights with her elbow and promises to come to town beginning this weekend, presenting us with the usual Indian Summer.

With her she brings static cling, door handle shocks, late suntans, fires, the twirling of fans and the hum of air conditioning. And hair that resembles fork lightning - oh wait, that's just mine :)

It's looking like a beach weekend. Get your boogie boards and sunscreen ready, kids!

My brain hurts!

which is nothing really new :)

Click on the chick. Do you see her twirling clockwise or counter clockwise?

Where's that old git Merlin when you need him?

I've decided it might be time for me to start caring again, about how I look. I think I'm well, WELL overdue for a physical overhaul. As I think about this, my mind drifts to all the other things that I need to be less wishy washy and stupid about.

So, in addition to the 'that kid in "Mask"' (the one with Cher) type makeover I'm going to have to address, I will make a few resolutions in advance of New Year's Eve. I know it's early, but why be predictable?! Anyhow, the reason - I'm hoping to have some of these resolutions down and out and tackled to the ground before the old year is over so I can laugh my way, or at least smirk a little, into 2008.

Here goes, in no particular order (she says, painfully):

1. Get in shape; eat more regularly and more healthily, so I can look in the bathroom mirror without crying salty tears thinking I walked into a Carnival fun house.
2. Write that little pirate story for "Cutthroat Conor of Ireland." Just for him.
3. Make money. Find (gulp) gainful employment.
4. Quit "da fags" (stupid, stupid, stupid! But oh so seductive with its murky mistress red wine)
5. Finish a couple of those stories gathering cat hair and dust.
6. Give Betsy an overhaul. Yeh, Bets, you heard me.
7. Perfect even further my perfect (and make even more 'potent') "Hemingway" mojito (to aid me with #10).
8. Do something for my US little "nieces and nephews" that they can keep forever. Just for them.
9. Make a 5 Year Plan (Ha! I'm sorry, Jackie Lyons, I can't even write that one with a straight face).
10. Track down and ply good ol' H.G. with a "Hemingway" or five so I don't miss anything with my family at any time.
11. (bonus) Hope for the return of creativity - and more importantly, the MIA-for-some-time willpower and drive. And beating someone, anyone, in Scrabulous. And a way to get to the Maldives. Oh, and the Aurora Borealis.

Oh mammy! From the looks of the above, I need way more than just a 'physical' overhaul. Wish me much luck. I'll need it! Especially with the wormhole thing.

Jack be nimble, Jack be gypped!

While me and Stephen were driving west bound down Sunset I had a little flash of a story idea. I have two sweet kiddies around me that are losing (and loosening) their teeth, top and bottom, and I thought of a tooth fairy story with a twist. Hooray.

Then we went into Borders and to my (as usual) horror, the fella that has cornered the market 'interpreting' fairy tales (Wicked! anyone?) had beaten me to it. Tooth fairy tale front and center on the shelves. Denied! Damn him!!!

Sorry Daniel and Valerie :( my gummy little friends.

Aw well, back to the drawing board...

The weather's beautiful...

Stephen has his rothar and we've cycled to Main Street for lunch at the Omelette Parlor. Sweet! It's so nice. It's a brain break and a half when he's around.

Marie dropped back the Hippy Tent, so I'm sure we'll be making use of that in the next couple of weeks. Happy flowers and all. Have I said the weather couldn't be better?

Shanny's planning on coming down at some point; looking forward to that. The Three Amigos again, unless Eoghan comes and then it's four. Should I have said the Three Musketeers and D'Artagnan? Either way, you catch my drift. It'll be a laugh however it shakes down.

And more biking. We'll have to try one of the numerous trails, probably Corral Canyon. That's a nice one. Or "Vietnam" as Stephen nicknamed it. I've robbed that one. Anyway, you splash through water, see little families of ducks, complete with their little gaggle of ducklings and we - scratch that - I always get scruffy. Good times, as Katrinka would say. :)

Anyway, that's it for today. Hope all is well where you all are.

Total Lunar Lullaby

I set me ol' alarm clock for 1:45am PST. I awoke all eager and with dogged determination to see something good. It moves sloooow. I spent the next hour nodding off and then waking in a panic to run outside.

Didn't look so "Total" as in 'dramatic' the way I always hope, but there was a 'Blood Moon' - kinda appealed to my imagination and brought to mind witches, paganism, kids stories and that movie with Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman. And most importantly of course, our existence on a floating ball in space. Scary. Wooo!

The moon was coppery and reddish. It took a good hour until I gave up. Lunacy. I witnessed it. I saw more stars than usual. Then I fell asleep. And for once, slept soundly and didn't hear the world's loudest sprinkler system go off for a change.

My imagination worked overtime. It's confirmed. I'm the definition of a "Moon Child."

Awe inspiring photos of the event, photographed by moi here:

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=5403&l=0300e&id=602237775

"Those who wish to sing always find a song"

I wrote this back in Dublin just before this past New Year's eve, which was a very difficult time. I don't think many that should have caught it, did, so I'm reposting on this new blog. A few months have passed and I think about it, and all of you, often. It's all still so hard, but I'm glad you're all still hanging in with me.
**************************************************************************
December 28, 2006

"Those who wish to sing always find a song"

...the above is an old Swedish proverb.

I used to love to sing; can't carry a note, but that never stopped me from belting one out, without notice, at the top of my lungs. And I thought I knew the lyrics to just about everything.

I used to hear songs everywhere and would happily sing along. I heard them in my family; little notes in little voices, in the faces of the kids I love; friends' kindnesses; in the kindness of strangers; in my kitty cat; in places other people didn't notice; in many a joke-filled hour. All this helped fill my repertoire. I sang along - with gusto.

I knew my life had changed on New Year's Eve 2005. I remember the moment. It was instantaneous. I just knew my life would never be the same. And I was right. It was hard to hear anything. An invisible presence skulked around me, stalking me - pulling at me, pushing me down, dragging me backwards, holding on and threatening to smother me until I could barely move or speak, let alone sing - until April of this year, when it engulfed me whole, muffling me completely.

I realize maybe it isn't that I can't find a song, I just haven't wished to sing. I know that I'm surrounded by beautiful notes and music; I'm reminded of that every day in my thoughtful, caring family; my beloved mother, who I know has had the same problem singing as myself; my friends who, and I know even more than ever now, have been humming steadily and unwaveringly to me all along. I hope you all know I tried to hear you. I hope you know how thankful I am.

So we all stand on the edge of a new arrangement, with lyrics yet to be written. Notes yet to be set to music. A new year. Perhaps a song to sing. Perhaps the wish to sing it.

I offer all my love to you all, especially those who have also missed music in their lives and have felt their own kind of silence. May the New Year bring you all health and happiness, with beautiful songs to be found in both familiar and unexpected places. Please sing. I hope to hear more clearly.

Those who wish to sing always find a song. I know she would want me to sing, as she always has; even, or maybe especially, if it's in my own off-key way. I hope to find a song. I hope. And that's the difference.

XXX

Gar's Celebrity Twin

I've said it for years. All the way back when I watched "Gilmore Girls" and this fella played "Jess" - Rory Gilmore's boyfriend.



Every time he was on screen he reminded me so much of my baby bro. It wasn't just the incredible physical resemblance; the character he played often brought Gareth into my living room too. The tough outer shell, with the sometimes prickly "I don't give a crap" air. This all masking the deep-thinking, caring, intelligent and thoughtful person, only the closest to him are fortunate to know.

Sweet. Inside and out.

So, Milo Ventimiglia and "Jess" - thanks for letting me live a little closer to my baby brother when miles and distance wouldn't.

Dangerous When De-Caffeinated

Why, you ask? Well, I can't answer that one.

What I can answer is the following:

In case you've all ever wondered who you should thank for me being very rarely, if ever, without caffeine (hence, not 'dangerous'), well, that would be Stephen. My brother. He is singularly responsible for my always, ALWAYS, having money on my Starbucks card. And I'm forever grateful. No matter what's going on in my life, he, by doing this, makes sure that I always have somewhere to go and something to have - and it prevents me from feeling like a complete and utter bum. And so when I walk out the door of Starbucks carrying my frappuccino or triple grande, I'm always leaving with much, much more than 'just a cup of coffee.' He will never know just how much his best-friendship means to me.

In closing, on those occasions when you find me "putupwithable", let it be known, Stephen's the reason why. Send your gratitude thataway!

Now, I'm going to go have a cup.

Will this thing see the light of day?

That's really the question :)

To Blog or not to Blog...

That is the question.